Leave The Leaves Alone

Recently, my parents packed the whole family into the van, and we went up the canyon to "look at the leaves." I was having a hard time wondering why any sane person with something better to do than homework would look at leaves. They're inherently boring, because they're part of trees. They don't move. They don't make inappropriate sounds. They're not interactive. And yet, we find people in our action driven society with ADHD who take time out of their busy schedules to look at leaves. "Why is this?" I asked myself. And then the answer came... because the colors are changing!

Now, let's think about this logically. The colors of leaves change when the leaves are DYING! That's pretty morbid. People get all excited about looking at trees because they're dying! This simply goes to show how much TV has desensitized society. After watching so many cop shows, and witnessing so many deaths (and that's not even including movies, which have titles dedicated to death and murder, ex. "Kill Bill") people are actually starting to enjoy watching death! Pretty soon, we'll all crowd to stadiums to watch famous people die! And when they do, the audience will simultaneously, and very ceremoniously, with a great deal of sorrow, perform the "wave."

Now that we're through with the whole death paragraph (that was to keep people interested), let's think about what makes the colors so special. I'm not so sure I can think of a reason. They turn red, orange, and yellow. Bright colors. But on the other hand, the green that they originally were is also a bright color (generally). The colors look like the trees are on fire (that's the reason for pyros). So, what's the best thing about orange, red and yellow? Well, the best reason I can think of would probably be that the letters of those words can be arranged to say, "Yo! Danger: Low Reels".

And so, as we come to the end of this blog, we come to wonder not only if this blog is long enough to receive full credit, but also if this blog will have any effect on this alarming trend in society. My guess is that it probably won't, because the text isn't in red, yellow and orange. And probably because it isn't dying.

Litterbugs: Insects or Not?

Though the title implies that I will be analyzing whether or not litterbugs are insects or not, you have been misled. They are most definitely not bugs, just close relatives in the "Things You Would Squish With Your Foot If You Had The Chance" Class. What would cause someone to litter? One answer is that they are simply bozos or jerks, or a combination of both. However, not all reasons are so straight forward.

The first main reason that people litter is because they don't think that just one person will make much of a difference. This is a self centered view of the world. Obviously, there are more people in the world who litter than one. Even if only one in a hundred people (and I'll be honest, there are more) littered, we would still have 60 million people in the world who are littering. And this is just one occurrence. For some, this is a recurring habit or addiction, sort of like drugs. Imagine the environmental degradation from this!

The next reason for littering is simply to "stick it to the man" or for challenge. This is comparable to other crimes like stealing, or murder. These type of people are frequently leaving trash where it would be noticed by others. It gives them great pleasure, and then they have to move up to the next level of littering. Frequently, these wild attempts to gain attention take more effort than just throwing the trash away. Just throw it away, the girls like it better if you care about the environment. It makes them think you're sensitive.

The last reason is that people are simply too lazy to throw away their trash. After all, this is the generation where everything is just a click away on the internet. A step or two would just be too far. So, without looking away from the monitor, they toss the trash behind them for their mom or some other responsible human being to pick it up. As if moms and those responsible people don't have enough to do already.

These are the main reasons that people litter. If this blog has offended you in any way, by all means, print it out, and crumple it up. Rip it up! Burn it! Draw on it! Please recycle when you're done. But if this is offending you, you're probably a litterbug, and you'll just throw it over your shoulder.